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Feet Faddish Three

Feet Faddish Three

It was hot today.

I got a reminder that three years ago on another July 13th I posted a photo of my feet, next to the pool I had just opened and the palm tree I had recently planted. Feet Faddish I called it. Then in September of 2021 I returned to my lawn chair with Feet Faddish Two.

Once again it’s the 13th of July and since it was hot and I was tired from working outside, I thought I would stop for the day, and revisit my feet, my pool, and my palm tree once more.

So I inflated my pool, and positioned my lawn chair so that my feet would rest “under” one of my palm trees.  My palm trees are growing but I had a scare in April when we had an unexpected cold snap.  My palm trees are still young so I wrap them in bubble wrap to protect them from the cold in the winter.  I made the mistake of unwrapping them a little early this year and I thought I had lost a number of trees.  Though most have come back, one didn’t make it and a couple more are struggling.

If you look close you can see on the other side of my pool is my Par One golf course green so the pool can double as a water hazard.

My sister-in-law Teesha has recently made the decision to retire to the somewhat mythically sounding place called Margaritaville, in South Carolina.  I am happy for her.  With my brother Carl now gone it has to be hard to remain in that house.

 

The Fourth of July week was pretty cool. Kim and I got to hang out with all the local family on the fourth.  Later in the week we took Cameron out to the Eastern Shore to see my dad who he hadn’t seen in a while and spend some time fishing and crabbing.  My California brother Gary was on the east coast with my sister in law Marie so we got to hang out a little.

 

Sunday morning I got a call from my old friend Donny R.   We grew up together, spending time in school, the Boy Scouts, and Oceanport Hook and Ladder.  Donny was a police officer in Oceanport and is now retired in upstate New York.  His birthday is close to mine in June so I wished him a late happy birthday.  Before I left New Jersey, we would often throw ourselves a combined birthday party in his backyard.

 

It was nice to hear from him.  He told me he lives about 20 miles from Saratoga Racecourse and I told him that visiting Saratoga was on my bucket list so he said we were welcome anytime.

Though it was very nice to hear from him, when you are my age, phone calls from old friends from home often come with some bad news too.  In the case of Donny’s phone call, it came with lots of bad news, the passing of three friends I knew from Oceanport.

 

Karen S.  was the daughter of two of my mom and dad’s best friends so we saw a lot of each other growing up though she was a bit younger.  And she ultimately married another friend of mine from Oceanport.

Larry Y.  was another Oceanport guy and member of the Oceanport Hook and Ladder.

Kevin A. was an Oceanport guy who was also a member of Oceanport Hook and Ladder.  Like Donny, Kevin was also a police officer in Oceanport.  My favorite Kevin story is the night he found me and my buddy Joe (who I have written about a number of times before) after a couple of beers attempting to get Joe on the back of my motorcycle so I could take him home.  Instead, Kevin nicely suggested we put Joe in the Police car and he followed me on my motorcycle first to Joe’s address to drop him off and then to my house where I waved him thanks and went safely to bed.

That was the mid 70’s.  It probably wouldn’t happen that way now, and probably shouldn’t.

 

In less than a week we will acknowledge another year of our Donny being gone, this year will make twenty years believe it or not.  His accident occurred July 19, 2002.

 

I have heard two messages discussing fear in the last week both originating from a similar part of our world on the Eastern Shore. One from our buddy Bill Ortt in Easton, and one in the Harriet Tubman story.  Harriet’s birthplace was just a few miles from my parent’s house in Dorchester County.

I must admit Harriet has become my new Sheroe in recent days and I have been trying to learn as much as I can about her.  Maybe that is another story for another day.

 

Trusting the information Kim received from the policeman she spoke with on the phone, Donny experienced no pain. But I have always been troubled by the concern of whether he experienced fear.

We know Savannah experienced fear that day and is still working to sort that out.

 

Bill Ortt’s message included quotes from Zig Ziglar, an author and motivational speaker who died in 2012.

Rev. Ortt explained that Zig would propose you could look at fear two ways:

One is FEAR meaning “Fear Everything and Run.”

The other is FEAR meaning “Face Everything and Rise.”

 

 

In Harriet’s story from the movie anyway, she is helped by a “conductor” on the Underground Railroad, Reverend Green who before she left on her first journey to freedom would advise her that “fear is our enemy. Trust in God. The North Star will guide you, follow the North Star…”

 

It’s a tough challenge but facing our fears does allow us to learn and grow.

And, trusting in God.

It worked for Harriet.

I know our Donny trusted in God, and that helps to mitigate the sorrow.

 

I don’t fear the day God calls me.  And like my wise friend Donny R. said, every day we wake up and get out of bed is another birthday and should be celebrated.

 

It’s not that I don’t get scared.  Like those times Kim is almost home from visiting her mother and the house is a wreck. But that is a different kind of fear.

Listen to Rev. Green and Father Bill.

Fear is your enemy.  Trust in God.  Let the stars guide you. And if you can’t see the stars follow the river.

Face your fears and rise up.

 

And as I remember the events of July 13, 2019:

“Cameron told me this morning that when I am not alive anymore, he wants my truck.

That caught me off guard a little but hey you never know.

You never know what God’s plan is.

 

So today, I think I will just sit by the pool, next to my little palm tree, and look at my feet.

The garage will be there tomorrow.

Me, and days like this, may not.”

 

Today was a day for me to take a little break.

And though I am really happy for my sister-in-law and her move to the mythical place called Margaritaville, I am sure that comes with some fears.

For now, me, with my little pool, my little palm trees, my banana trees, my one-hole golf course, I have all the amenities I need to rest my feet in my mythical place I can call “Box Wine Ville” if I want.

Fear will be there tomorrow, me, and days like this may not.

Trust in God, He will guide you.

 

Postscript:

Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families of Karen, Larry, and Kevin.

I’ll Stand

I’ll Stand

I was startled to find the pastor standing over me.

This “Pastor” was not like any pastor I have ever seen before.  Dressed all in black with a demonic look, more Satan-like, he was standing on my pew near where my head laid.  He was preaching about me and drawing the attention of the congregation sitting in the pews around me.  He was mocking me and humiliating me for stretching out in the pew and falling asleep during his sermon, so I became the sermon. And pointed out to all in the room I was even using Bibles as a pillow.

 

It was about 2 a.m. and after not being able to fall asleep in my office chair, I wandered down the hallway to the sanctuary and in the dark, I picked a pew a few rows from the front and laid down.  Better, I thought, though nothing like my bed, at least I could stretch out. Without a pillow, I reached out and grabbed a couple of books, hymnals or Bibles, not sure, and put them under my head.

This is kind of creepy, I thought.  I am trying to sleep in the same place where I got married and baptized; a place where I have attended the funerals of my friends, and Donny’s funeral.

Exhausted though, I drifted off to sleep

Maybe an hour later I was awoken In the middle of my dream with the demonic, Satan-like pastor. I checked the books beneath my head to see if they were Bibles. Finding only hymnals, I felt some relief.

For the first time since before the pandemic, my church held its annual yard sale.   I have written about it before.  It is quite a large, work-intensive event and typically it requires a few of us to work all night long in preparation. On this early pre-sale morning, however, we were fairly organized and it allowed me the opportunity to try to grab a little rest.

Not sure the church pew idea was my best choice though.

 

On June 16 I got a nice early Father’s Day gift.  Hayley was asked to be the keynote speaker at the Broad Run High School Graduation.  And it was broadcast online so Kim and I could watch it from our living room.  That was probably a good thing too because I didn’t even make it through the introduction by the Principal before the tears started rolling down my face.   Hayley did an awesome job, of course using the example of her “She-roe,” Ruth Bader Ginsburg to base her message.

Life Lessons (abridged version):

  1. Empower yourself, be independent.
  2. Find a true life partner, one that loves you unconditionally.
  3. Learn to welcome debate and difference. There is nothing wrong with having difficult conversations.
  4. We should all do our part to positively change the world. Work to repair the world.

It was awesome, she did a great job, and I was very proud, but little more dehydrated by the end.

Father’s Day weekend I was home alone again.    Kim had to go up to see her mom and I had work to do here. Though we find ourselves needing to do this a lot, I don’t think you ever really get used to it.  And I will admit I was a little depressed.  I listened to Bill Ortt’s 5:00 sermon on Saturday afternoon.  Then I listened to it again.  Then I listened again.

Interestingly his message contained elements similar to Hayley’s:

“What can I do” (to make the world better).

“We do have a stewardship responsibility for the way we communicate with one another.”

“Let each of you speak the truth with your neighbor, for we are members of one another”

 

Wise messages from some wise folks.  I hope I can live up.

 

On Father’s Day of course I heard from all the kids, but it was hearing my dad wish me a “happy father’s day” on my mother’s cell phone that was the highlight of my day.  I didn’t think I was going to be able to work out talking to him but it was a nice surprise and he did pretty good.

As I mentioned at the beginning, this past weekend was my church’s yard sale which was a lot of work but a lot of fun too with some awesome people.

And today is my birthday.

I just listened to the voice mail from Kim’s 97-year-old Aunt Laferne.  Every year she calls to sing “Happy Birthday” to you.  We don’t answer on purpose because we want to save it.

And like Father’s Day, I got to talk to my dad on my mom’s cell phone again and he wished me a “Happy Birthday” and he talked about having too many boats.  I told him you can never have too many boats.

 

Tomorrow we will celebrate Cameron’s birthday, on Wednesday Kim’s birthday, on Thursday we will remember the anniversary of my brother Carl going Home, and on Friday celebrate our 22nd wedding anniversary.

A busy time.

 

Sorry for rambling a bit.

But I suppose there are some morals in the story.

Like, find a true life partner, one that loves you unconditionally.  I will celebrate that later in the week.

Welcome debate and difference but we do have a stewardship responsibility for the way we communicate with each other.

We should all do what we can to make the world better.

Never fall asleep in church.

And finally, you can never have too many boats.

 

Postscript:

The birthday crown I am wearing in the photo above was made for me by Miss Laurie, co-teacher of my BFF’s, aka the “Dreamers.”

I haven’t had a chance to read my FB but will later, thanks for the birthday wishes.

I woke up this morning with the song “In Christ Alone” in my head. The version that Alison Krauss sings with the Getty’s.  I think if ever I would imagine an angel singing it would have the voice of Alison Krauss. She sings the first verse in this version.

“Till He returns, or calls me home,

Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand”

Society’s Child 2022

Society’s Child 2022

Since last Friday was April 1st, it was time to switch the Guitar calendar on my office wall to May.  We always keep the Guitar calendar a month ahead and refer to a more traditional calendar hanging next to the Guitar calendar for those dates in the current month.

I took one more look at the April birthday list before inserting the pushpin into the corkboard and officially switching it over to May.

April 7th, I noted, Janice Ian’s birthday.

That brought to mind the only Janice Ian song I could think of Society’s Child.

Unless you are my age or older you may not be familiar with Janice Ian.

A Jersey girl though not typically associated with the music we now identify as the Jersey sounds made famous by Bruce Springsteen and Little Steven, she was born in Farmingdale, not far from where I grew up, and went to high school in East Orange.

Janice Ian wrote the song Society’s Child (Baby I’ve been Thinking) when she was thirteen.  The song was about an interracial relationship between a young white girl and a young black boy, and the negative treatment she received from her mom, other students, and teachers.

Her “Society.”

By the end of the song, she says, “I don’t want to see you anymore” and gives in to the pressure.

But not before saying the line “When we’re older, things may change. But for now, this is the way they must remain.”

 

 

I heard a great sermon last Sunday.

One I needed to hear I think in my continued funk.

One that helped to put some of my concerns in perspective.

It was in fact, about perspective.

 

“How critically important it is for me to have to stop in these times when you seem to be being bowled over by shock, anxiety, trauma, and the need to find just a moment to breathe in, take a breath of the Grace of God; to just find some sustenance.  And it may not change what’s going on but it will give you strength.  And God intends us to know something of that peace in the midst of chaos…

The kind of peace that comes to us in the midst of crisis, tumult, and pain…it is strength to know the presence of God, and it’s wisdom,” said the preacher.

 

Unless you live under a rock, you know we have all these things in our world, and some folks may even be experiencing crisis and pain in their personal lives.

 

But what about in those quieter times?

Those times when we may not be experiencing crisis (but everything is a crisis right?), just the normal stresses of work, family, finances, and life in general.

 

A couple of thousand years ago near or maybe even on this day, Jesus stopped on his way to Jerusalem to hang out with some friends and enjoy some quiet time before what he knew was the inevitable.

You may be familiar with the story of Martha and Mary.

Martha runs around stressed and anxious as she prepares the meal in the kitchen while her sister Mary just chills at the feet of Jesus.

She even asks Jesus to tell Mary to help her.

But Jesus tells her “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed…Mary has chosen what is better…

Mary understands the peace of God while Martha creates a crisis.

I am too often guilty of having the Martha thing going on I am afraid, and might be better served to take a seat.

 

According to what I have read, Atlantic Records recorded Society’s Child (Baby I’ve Been Thinking) but then refused to release it and when it finally was released on a different label many radio stations wouldn’t play it.

This was 1966 and 1967.

The world was different then.

Right?

And “When we’re older, things may change.”

Right?

I think so.

In 1966 and 1967 I was ten and eleven years old.

And through my eyes much has changed in the last fifty-five years.

I have changed.

People I know and love have changed

Our country has changed.

 

But nevertheless, if you look and live like me, and believe what I believe, society would have me labeled as a racist, a capitalist, a homophobe, and whatever else.

Yup, that’s me, Society’s Child of the 2020’s I guess.

And I will admit, I take some offense to that.

 

I watched video of former President Obama’s return to the White House this week.  It reminded me that it really wasn’t that long ago that we weren’t so racist in this country and that we had come a long way since 1966.

But now that has all changed again.

 

It is sad that we can’t put our world in a more realistic perspective, can’t recognize the change that has occurred in humanity, and in the hearts of individuals.  It just may help progress to continue.

I am older now, and I have seen that things do change, things have not remained that way in all circumstances. And I also recognize more change is necessary.

Yet, some want to create a crisis.

And some understand the peace of God.

Choosing what is better.

Sitting at the feet of Jesus.

But that is just my perspective.

 

Postscript:

The photo above was taken last week on my most recent visit to see my Pops.  Janice Ian isn’t the only famous person to have a birthday in April because Monday April 11 is my dad’s birthday.  He will be 93 years old.  So just in case I don’t get around to paying him some attention in words I will acknowledge him here.