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Singing a Nickel Song

Singing a Nickel Song

I am back from western Pennsylvania and I am home alone again.

My wife stayed to help her mom.

Sunday afternoon I was sitting alone on the couch in my basement watching the Steeler’s play the Titans when a bug literally flew up my nose.

“Seriously?” I said out loud as I snorted and shivered.

“A bug just flew up my nose?”

Ironically with everything that has not gone well this crazy year of 2020, the Steelers began this game 5 and 0 for the season.  Though they were winning early in the fourth quarter, they did their best to set up the typical Steelers nail biter finish by pretty much letting the Titans catch up.

But it’s just football in a year when everything that has happened or equally as important, isn’t happening makes it just trivial.

On the way up to Pennsylvania last week I took a break at my usual stopping place, a McDonalds in Clear Springs, Maryland.  Returning to my truck I found a nickel on the pavement.

I had to think but don’t remember the last time I saw a nickel.

 

When I was a kid growing up in Oceanport, New Jersey I lived on a dead-end street. Once my dad finished building our house on property he bought from my mother’s parents, there were seven houses on the street.  According to my mother, my great grandparents owned all the property on the street at one time.  What was not sold off was left to my grandmother. The street was called Willow Court because of the numerous willow trees that grew on the end closer to the river.   Access to my street was via my little town’s bustling business district that we referred to as “downtown” and off one of the main roads called Oceanport Avenue.  As you made the turn it did a dog leg right up to where it ended with an apple tree.

Oceanport had a variety of commercial establishments “downtown” and how you remembered them depended on what era you identified with.  Art’s liquor store was one, Art was the grandfather of my first friend John who lived in a house on the river behind the liquor store.   Our friendship was arranged between our moms since we would soon need each other to walk to school because we were starting kindergarten that year.  We remained friends a long time.

There were also three gas stations or service stations as they were known back then;  a drug store called Park’s Drug store, and a couple of luncheonettes.  Bob and Norma’s was on the river side, and also sold convenience items like cards and razor blades, and deodorant.

I once bought my grandfather some Old Spice deodorant from Bob and Norma’s for his birthday.  I am pretty sure that was his best gift ever.  My mother even worked there as a “soda jerk” when she was in high school.

Next to Bob and Norma’s was the Village Market run by a guy named Frank Callahan.  His son Kenny would join my friend John and I and become good friends from kindergarten.

Being just over the bridge from the Army base at Fort Monmouth, we had three barbershops and three bars that kept busy.  In the middle of all these businesses was a large, very old house which was owned and occupied by my great grandparents when they were alive.  When I was a kid however, it was then left to my grandmother and had four apartments which she rented out.  In my family we referred to it as “The Big House.”

I was very familiar with nickels growing up as a kid in the early 60’s because our kid currency mainly consisted of nickels and pennies.  We worked for those nickels and pennies by scouring the properties around those businesses for deposit bottles.  You could get two cents for a small size bottle like an eight ounce Coke bottle or a nickel for a larger twenty eight ounce bottle.  With those three bars, the liquor store, the three service stations with soda machines, those luncheonettes, and the market, we had the deposit bottle business locked up in that neighborhood.

Throw in a whole lot of GI’s in town with the Vietnam conflict ramping up, and the Monmouth Park Racetrack less than a mile up the road when horse racing was in its heyday in the 60’s and yup, the bottle deposit business could be lucrative.

And this was before there were litter laws.

Bottles were everywhere.

 

As a result, an enterprising six or seven year old could do pretty well.

We would just go find our days’ work of bottles, take them over to Callahan’s market, plop them on the counter, and wait for our payout.

Then we would take our earnings and head down the street to Park’s Drug store to do our part in helping the local economy.  Mr. Park the pharmacist was kind of grouchy and scary but the guy that worked for him, Rios was always happy.  We could get our Bazooka Bubble gum for a penny, or maybe some baseball cards and gum, or Beatles cards and gum, or on a good bottle day maybe even an ice cream sandwich.

As I got just a little bit older the bigger money could be made raking leaves.  I could actually get a quarter or two out of my grandmother for raking leaves.

I hated raking leaves for my grandmother.

But work was work.

You had to take it when you could get it.

And in the winter, my brother Carl and I would team up and shovel snow.

We would walk the neighborhoods and knock on doors and shovel snowy sidewalks.  That was really the big time because a sidewalk in the snow could be worth a buck or two.  We split it 50/50, but most times we just ended up in the luncheonette eating our profits.

 

Life was very different.

A nickel like I found and tossed into the console of my truck maybe never to be seen again, had some value then.

On Sundays we went to church and Sunday School in the morning but because businesses were closed due to Blue Laws we couldn’t do much else on Sunday afternoons.

We had Sunday football on TV but it was in black and white, and baseball was still the big attraction back then so not too many paid attention.

And since blue laws meant the bottle deposit business was shut down too, maybe I raked my grandmother’s leaves, or helped my dad the basement as he built something (I hated that even more).

Now we don’t go to church on Sunday mornings because of COVID, but we can go shopping till we turn blue.

Go figure.

Well that’s my two cents worth or five cents worth, but luckily you don’t have to take it when you can get it.

 

As expected with 14 seconds left the Titans just needed to make a 46 yard field goal to tie the game and send it in to overtime.

Then the snap… the hold…Gostkowski’s kick was up…

And it passed just right of the uprights.

He missed, and the Steelers went to 6 and 0.

Maybe a bug flew up his nose?

 

The moral of the story?

 

Hard work pays off?

We need to return to a life that was simpler?

or

It’s best to be alone when a bug flies up your nose.

 

Post Script:

Make sure you get out and vote!

“I Held My Nose, I Closed My Eyes…I Took A Drink”

“I Held My Nose, I Closed My Eyes…I Took A Drink”

“Fillet of a fenny snake, In the cauldron boil and bake; Eye of newt and toe of frog, Wool of bat and tongue of dog, Adder’s fork and blind-worm’s sting, Lizard’s leg and owlet’s wing, For a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.”

 (Witch’s Brew recipe written in Shakespeare’s Macbeth)

 

It’s almost Halloween.

I read once that Halloween was second only to Christmas in retail sales.  I have since read that is a myth.

But still, it’s a big deal to some, especially kids, and like everything else this year it won’t be the same.

That’s too bad.

 

Our typical day starts out with Kim and I having our first cup of coffee in bed as we check our email, check the weather, maybe our banking, and of course some social media.

This morning as I opened my Facebook I was greeted with a post reminding me that today is World Mental Health Day.

I might argue that a reminder of World Mental Health on Facebook could be perceived as an oxymoron but I was happy for the heads up.

In a great many cases and to varying degrees,  the results of the conditions we currently are living and working and schooling under have taken its toll on our mental health.

Many sought new ways of staying active physically and mentally while social distancing.  There was a time earlier in the year when you couldn’t buy a bicycle or a kayak as everyone tried to take on activities that lent themselves more to distancing from others.

If you want to social distance you can’t do that much better than being on a kayak.

 

Strangely, Kim and I, though we already had kayaks and bicycles, spent only a small amount of time riding our bikes this year and in fact never used our kayaks even once.

For physical activity, we walked a lot.

For fun, we spent a lot of time in our back yard.

And in our back yard, we worked our gardens.

Kim’s garden this year featured lemon balm, elderberries, horseradish, peppers, tomatoes, and herbs.

She even grew a pepper known as the Trinidad Moruga Scorpion!

According to PEPPERHEAD.com the Trinidad Moruga Scorpion will wreak your stomach, burn your intestines and still be smoking on the way out and is considered to be the second hottest pepper in the world.

We found that even just handling them was dangerous.

 

And as the pandemic focused our attention on building our immunity and trying to keep from getting the virus, Kim developed a new hobby, herbal concoctions that boost immunity, depress symptoms, help you relax and sleep.

I have mentioned our regular consumption of elderberry syrup in a previous post as a good source of boosting our immunity.

Normally we would go out and buy our syrup made locally by the Village Winery in Waterford, Virginia.

This year however my wife decided to fire up the cauldron and make it herself.

And in addition to elderberry syrup to boost our immunity she made elderberry tincture.

And in addition to the elderberry tincture, she made lemon balm tincture.  Lemon balm tincture is supposed to reduce our stress and help with our sleep.

 

Today however was the day she was to prepare the mother of all home remedies.

FIRE CIDER!

Just the sound of it gave me chills.

“For a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.”

I don’t know if it includes any of those ingredients mentioned by Mr. Shakespeare in Macbeth but I do know it has garlic, turmeric root, ginger root, horseradish root, onions, lemons, apple cider vinegar (with the “mother” in it, you will have to look that one up), peppercorns, and I don’t know that I care to know what else.

And in at least one of those batches she added the Trinidad Moruga Scorpion!

Once you have all this stuff mixed together you keep it in a cool place for six weeks while it does whatever it does until I have to drink it.

One thing is for sure, in addition to my lemon balm tincture and my elderberry tincture before bed, and my elderberry syrup in the morning; once that Fire Cider is ready in six weeks I surely won’t need to worry about social distancing because that should pretty much take care of itself.

Masks will be required.

 

Last year near this same time I wrote a post titled “Oh Well” that discussed mental illness and former Fleetwood Mac founding member Peter Green’s life of dealing with mental illness.  Again this year on my 2020 Guitar Calendar hanging on the wall of my office I am reminded of Peter Green’s October 29th birthday along with other famous guitarists.

However Peter Green died this past July peacefully in his sleep at the age of 73.  The cause of death has never been released by the family though some have speculated his mental health problems may have contributed to his death.

 

So on this World Mental Health Day, I am reminded about how important it is to keep busy, keep physically active, and find a hobby.

Go buy a kayak or a bicycle if you can find one, or get yourself a dehydrator and a large pot.

Find some wacky folks on YouTube living off the grid in the upper Northwest and learn how to start brewing concoctions in your kitchen.

But find something.

 

And now as we approach the bewitching hour, my beautiful little witch-doctor wife is fast asleep with dreams of other potions dancing in her head, and I am still waiting for my lemon balm tincture to kick in.

It was a good day and I am looking forward to six weeks from now when I might get a chance to say:

“Honey, this Fire Cider is awesome but I think it might need a little more fillet of fenny snake”

“Just sayin'”

 

She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink
She said “I’m gonna make it up right here in the sink”
It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink
I held my nose, I closed my eyes… I took a drink*

 

One of the three brewed batches of FIRE CIDER from today. It doesn’t look so bad today, let’s see how it looks and tastes after six weeks in the cold and dark. Pray for me. And my co-workers.

 

Post Script:

*“I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink” is from Love Potion Number Nine a song written by Jed Leiber and recorded by The Searchers back in the 60’s.

Shakespeare Macbeth witch’s brew recipe is courtesy of University of Minnesota

The feature photo is courtesy of Unsplash and photographer Tikkho Maciel.

Happy Halloween.

Life in the Wobbly Cart

Life in the Wobbly Cart

On a trip earlier in the week to the grocery store I got to the checkout and transferred my cart to the checker.  It was in one of those stores where the checker pulls your cart on his/her side.  When all was done I inserted my debit card and paid the bill as he pushed the cart around for me, handed me the receipt, and said:

“Hey, it looks like you got the wobbly cart.”

The “wobbly cart.”

You know, the one where at least one wheel wants to do everything but what you want it to do.

The one that makes the “rrraaattt tat ta tat’ sound all around the store as you push it with one arm or the other acting in overtime to compensate for the pull as you try to act all casual while you know everyone you pass in the store is thinking:

“Look at that poor guy, he got the wobbly cart.”

 

So on this day when the guy says “Hey, it looks like you got the wobbly cart,” I just laughed and said back,

“Yeah the wobbly cart, that’s the story of my life.”

So then he says “that sounds like a good title for a book, “Life in the Wobbly Cart.”

I thought to myself, man if he only knew the half of it.

 

I understand, in my family, we call it the Christiansen Curse.

Kim reminded me this morning that tomorrow starts Yom Kippur.

My Jewish friends and family might relate with the expression,

“Ma nishtana!”

This Hebrew saying according to the Urban Dictionary is used to express utter lack of surprise at a supposed piece of news. It’s a way of saying “Tell me something I don’t knowor “What else is new?” with a snarky urban Jewish twist.

 

 

Friday was a bad day for me.

I went in early on Friday to get a head start on cutting church grass which is pretty much an all day job.

Immediately I ran into an IT problem that is normally not a big deal but on this day it took extra time to resolve.

 

Once I got that issue squared away, now having lost an hour, I went out to start working on the property only to find my left rear tire on my lawn mower was flat.

So I went for my air pump but couldn’t find a charged battery or the charger to charge the battery.

After some more lost time I got the flat tire squared away and got to work.

 

But before I did I texted my wife “Christiansen curse day.”

 

Then to top it all off while I was mowing, I stepped in dog shhhh…..poo.

Dog Poo.

And I didn’t only just step in it I literally slid through it for about a foot.

“That’s just perfect,” I thought to myself.

 

Next, I get a text message from Alexa that said “Christian says he is sad because he misses you.”

Christian, the kid who once, while visiting him in Hollywood, Florida said, “Pop Pop I haven’t seen you in years and years,” can really put the screws to you.

Another sad reminder of the times.

 

Finally, as my day was winding down, my wife texted me to ask if I wanted to go to Carrabba’s for dinner.

I was tired and I had such a crummy day the thought of going out and relaxing with my wife sounded awesome.

I wasn’t hungry since I had eaten twice that day and of course, it had to have been leftover spaghetti and meatballs,  but hey I thought,  I will just have a bowl of soup.  And since Carrabba’s gives you that awesome bread and olive oil with spices to dip it in, I would be good.

Yeah okay, I admit it, I am one of those guys who will order a bowl of soup, get the bread, and be happy.

Because I am cheap.

Ry Cooder sings a song written a long time ago by Josh White called One Meatball.

It’s a song about a guy who only has fifteen cents to eat with so he searches restaurants and menus until he finds a place where he can purchase something to eat for fifteen cents, one meatball.

Everyone in the restaurant is aghast as the waiter calls out the order for one meatball and then proceeds to remind him:

“You gets no bread with one meatball.”

With the day I was having as I sheepishly ordered my one bowl of soup, I was half expecting the server to call out loudly:

“You gets no bread with one bowl of soup.”

 

Finally now relaxing and enjoying my bowl of soup and my bread, I open up my Facebook to find my three daughters, my three little chickens, putting me out on social media for not remembering them on “National Daughters Day.”

My final kick for the day.

Oh well.

“Ma nishtana.”

“You gets no bread with one meatball.”

That’s life in the wobbly cart.

 

 

Okay, now maybe I can get back to that book now.

“Life in the Wobbly Cart.”

Chapter One.

Let’s see, how should I start…?

 

 

Post Script:

After having basically finished this I dipped out to Lowe’s to pick up a couple of things.  I entered the store then realized I might need a cart.  I went back out and there, right next to the sterilizing station, was one cart.

I wiped it down and started my shopping.

And guess what kind of cart it was.

Yup.

“That’s just perfect,” I thought.

 

Happy National Daughters Day to Savannah, Hayley, and Alexa.

I still love you more than meatballs.

 

Yom Tov.

See You in September

See You in September

An elderly couple decided to go out for breakfast recently at their local diner in Cambridge Maryland.

Though disease had infiltrated his body and mind limiting the activities that energized him and that he once enjoyed in life, going out to eat was still a treat thankfully now that the covid restrictions had been eased.  But even the once easy decision to drop into a restaurant, though still enjoyable and special, was now complicated and not just on account of the virus.

Slowly and unsteadily, relying on the aluminum frame and wheels of the walker he has to use now, he navigated his way to the table and backed into the chair to sit.

As is the routine she, his wife, body bent and looking frail but still strong in mind and determination, gets him situated in his chair and inched up to the table.

This is the ritual, whether it’s in a public restaurant or at home, that goes on day after day, multiple times a day.  Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and coffee breaks all take on significant importance, but all require a similar concern, attention, and patience.

 

On this day the breakfast itself went uneventful.

But when she went to pay the bill something very unexpected and never-before experienced happened.

She wasn’t able to pay the bill.

Not because she couldn’t afford it.

But because there was no bill for her to pay.

Someone had paid their bill already.

 

 

In these days of virtual church, Kim and I have discovered another Eastern Shore connection in Father Bill Ortt, the Rector of Christ Church in Easton, Maryland.

In a recent awesome sermon, he referred to these verses in Chapter 12 of Romans.

9 Love must be sincere.  Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.  10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.  Honor one another above yourselves… 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

 

Not a bad reminder for us these days.

In his message, Father Ortt presented a good illustration of how the daily stresses we face as individuals   can affect us.  His sermon included a personal story of how he witnessed a young mother having a bad start to her day in a Starbucks in Ocean City and sharing her unhappiness quite vocally with all of those around her.

Though it sounded like this person’s behavior was inappropriate for that venue or any venue, I am sure we have all been close to losing it lately.

 

It’s tough to be a parent right now.

It’s tough to be a kid.

It’s tough to be a grandparent.

And it’s tough to be a great grandparent.

 

Labor Day Kim and I were driving home.  The next day was the first day of school for our area which meant Cameron would be starting the fifth grade and Hayley her thirteenth year of teaching at Broad Run High School.  Christian, one of my little guys in Florida had already started his first year of school by starting Kindergarten virtually, a couple of weeks earlier.

On that ride home I thought about my first days of school and particularly my grammar (elementary school) years and me in my fifth grade.  Fifth grade was one of my favorite years in school.

And so, as is often the case with me, I started singing a song.

“See You in September” was released by the Happenings in 1966, the year I started the fifth grade.

And while I drove and relived in my mind the memories of my childhood, I sang it over and over again.

At some point on the road trip my wife who had been quietly working on her iPad, looked at me and asked, “are you seriously going to sing that song all day?”

“Sorry” I said.

But I never really answered the question because unfortunately for Kim the answer was…

“Yes!”

But to the best of my ability, at least for the rest of that car ride I tried to sing just to myself as I reminisced about the excitement and that feeling of being reunited with  friends and classmates for another school year in 1966.

This year Cameron and Christian and a lot of other kids are not getting to experience the excitement that I remembered about returning to school in September.

And Hayley as a teacher can’t foster mentoring relationships that are so important to the student and the teacher.

And the parents of these students are juggling jobs from offices and homes as they also assume the role of teaching assistant.

And sometimes…they kirk out at Starbucks.

 

And Kim and I have to weigh the risks against the needs as we struggle to make our decisions to social distance with some of the younger members of the family yet continue to work out ways to provide support to our aging parents.

 

But thankfully our parents, limited now not just from the virus but by their own physical abilities, can still enjoy a time out having a meal while respecting the necessary social distancing requirements.

 

And at least on one occasion anyway, experiencing that love still exists in some hearts.  Even in the hearts of strangers.

 

 

My mother literally sobbed on the phone as she told us the story of her and my father having breakfast at the Cambridge Diner one morning this past week when someone paid their breakfast bill.

 

Maybe he or she good Samaritan saw that even after all those years, love can still be sincere and patient.

Maybe he or she was sick of the hate that we have to experience on our televisions and social media and wanted to reach back to a better time when we treated others with brotherly love and honored others above ourselves.  And through an act of hospitality, spread joy to those who may be afflicted and in need.  Even if that need might just be to have a little hope and share in a little joy while having breakfast.

Maybe this person heard Pastor Ortt’s message.

 

It was a nice gesture.

One that my mom and my dad will never forget.

And me too.

 

And so whoever you are out there who treated my parents to breakfast recently, I thank you.

And may God bless you.

 

Bye-bye, so long, farewell…

Have a good time but remember
There is danger in the summer moon above

See you in September
See you when the summer’s through*

 

Our summer is through.

Hate what is evil.

Cling to what is good.

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.

 

And hang in there.

 

 

Post Script:

The photos above are of Christian on his first day of school, Cameron on his first day of school, Hayley on her first day of school, and me in the fifth grade.

*Lyrics from See You in September written by Sid Wayne and Sherman Edwards.

Sir Sidney, My 2020 Horse of the Year

Sir Sidney, My 2020 Horse of the Year

Sir Sidney came home to us last night.  Me and my three kids drove 5 hours for him.  When he was walked out to me he was in tatters…. rain rot, bleached by the sun, deep gash on his withers, shoes look 3 months old, and he only has three of them hanging on by a thread.  Large osselet on the left front.  He was in a pasture with a sheep out in the middle of nowhere.  I took him anyway.  I paid for him just to get him out of there.  He seems very pleased with himself to be here.  Dr. will xray his osselet so we can make sure we keep him comfortable and serviceable, and the farrier will be here tomorrow to give his feet some much needed relief. He’s had 5 homes in the past 12 months, so he is now ours.  He will be babied from now on and will never know hard work again. He will be treated as a show horse here.  Lots of grass and hunter ponies and his own stall – blanketed when needed and he will have proper vet farrier dental and nutrition.  I hope you have a BLESSED day today…

 (An email to me from Tiffany M. received Wednesday, August 19)

 

 

A couple of weeks ago I was lying in bed on a Friday morning, not wanting to get out from under the covers, not wanting to go to work, just lamenting and feeling the weight of this unusual summer.

On that day it was mid-August and the signs of the summer’s ultimate passing had already begun.  Sitting out on the deck the evening before I had commented to Kim on how early the deck light with its darkness sensor was now tripping on. Our unusual summer was showing signs of winding down.  Some might think signaling the end of this summer might be a good thing.  That might be true if at least some of the reasons this summer has been so traumatic could be changed. But we can’t change God’s plan.  We can only change that which we can control. But the thoughts of moving into the fall and the early darkness combining seasonal affective disorder with coronavirus depression could be quite scary for many.

What do you do at 4:45 p.m. in the afternoon when it is dark outside?  How do you exercise safely, how do you go out and walk in nature and forget about being socially restricted.

Wouldn’t it be nice if our country’s leaders would consider that and extend Daylight Savings Time through the fall and winter this year to help us cope with our “new normal.”

 

On that Friday morning when I was feeling down and out, still in bed but now with a cup of coffee, I opened up my email. While I was asleep I had received this email:

It’s way past midnight and I’m sitting here doing Internet search on an 11-year-old off the track thoroughbred by the name of Sir Sidney. He is the now 11-year-old son of Ghostzapper. I found nothing of great interest other than racing stats and equivalent information. But I was craving a nice photograph or video…. Then I happened upon this: 

A SENTIMENTAL RACETRACK JOURNEY

 May 1, 2019 Curtisc27@Gmail.Com 

 Thank you for this wonderful article. 

You see, I was considering buying this fella for my family. Sight unseen, taking the trailer to meet he and his current owner in a couple days.

 Reading this article sealed the deal.

 I guess I found my Sir Sidney after all. And we will live him well. Wish us luck!!

 

Sent from my iPhone

(Received at 12:29 a.m. Friday, August 14 from Tiffany M.)

 

 

Wait…Sir Sidney?

 

I don’t know Tiffany M. but I do know Sir Sidney.

 

Sidney is part of my sentimental racetrack journey.

 

Once again, after reading Tiffany’s email, I got sentimental.

 

I even got a little teary-eyed.

 

I read Tiffany’s email to Kim.

 

I read “A Sentimental Racetrack Journey” again.

 

Then I read Tiffany’s email again.

 

And I got a little teary once more.

 

I got out of bed.

 

No longer feeling like staying under the covers I was now feeling totally elated.

 

 

Since I last wrote about Sidney just before last year’s Kentucky Derby, he ran eight more races running his last race on July 22, 2019, as a ten-year-old.

Born March 6, 2009, Sir Sidney had worked really hard since he ran his first race on New Year’s Day in 2012 as a three-year-old.  After three races that year, he would be sidelined until that third Saturday in May of 2014 when I was inadvertently introduced to Sir Sidney as a result of that botched wager. On that day he was five years old winning his first race. Over his career that ended last summer, he had run 68 races and finished in the top three 29 times, twelve of those as the winner earning a total of  $269,119.00.  This past March he officially turned eleven years old and was now finally retired.

 

The old guy who last year was still out there working, having to prove himself against the younger fellas, could now relax.

 

But Sir Sidney’s first year of retirement wasn’t like busting out in the RV and taking that dream trip across the country.

 

Nope, he got shuffled from one owner to another and had five homes in twelve months and as was evident in Tiffany description of him in her email of August 19, no one was caring for him anymore.

 

Sidney’s long and proud journey that included all those years of fighting to win was now forgotten. In quite the literal sense, Sidney had been put out to pasture and neglected.

 

Then Sid’s angel of mercy on a wing and a prayer, this nice lady named Tiffany, made the impetuous decision to drive many hours go get him sight unseen.

 

She “found her Sir Sidney after all.”

 

And in doing so she saved Sid.

 

 

Now Sidney can really enjoy his retirement.

He is not being asked to win races anymore, but he is still winning hearts.

He is appreciated and being cared for by a wonderful family.

He “will never know hard work again.”

 

And me?

I am still elated.

Once again we are reacquainted.

Once again he becomes part of my journey.

Once again I got goosebumps.

 

And I get to follow how happy he is by the photos I can view.

 

Next Saturday is the 146th running of the Kentucky Derby.

It’s not generating the same amount of excitement and sense of optimistic anticipation of producing a new National Obsession as it would normally do for me on the first Saturday in May,  which also serves as my personal unofficial first day of summer.

In fact, it’s being run on Labor Day weekend, the unofficial end of summer.

 

But of course, I will watch.

 

And I hope you will watch too.

 

And like I said in “A Sentimental Racetrack Journey” before last year’s Derby:

 

“I hope you take some time this Saturday and watch the Kentucky Derby. I hope you pay attention to the stories, enjoy the majestic beauty of these animals, get caught up in the drama.

I hope you find something sentimental in the experience that makes you want to return.

I hope you find your Sir Sidney.”

 

Like I did.

Like Tiffany did.

 

Sir Sidney, once again, my vote for Horse of the Year.

 

Post Script:

I would like to thank Tiffany and her family for saving this horse and providing a loving and safe environment for Sidney to enjoy his retirement.

And for sharing the experience with me.

And as for that BLESSED day, it surely was, and not just for me.

Life is Good!
 Hurricane Who?

 Hurricane Who?

Three twenty-two in the afternoon of August 3 and I am just crossing the Frederick C. Malkus Bridge over the Choptank River into Cambridge, Maryland.  Off in the distance in the direction of my parent’s house, I could see bolts of lightning crashing out of the dark cloud mass moving up from the south.  A couple of small issues delayed my departure and of course I had to stop at Trader Joe’s, or can I say Trader Jose’s, or wait maybe now it’s “The Supermarket Formerly Known as Trader Joe’s” to pick up some wine (that’s a whole other story).  Now a little angry that I am behind schedule, I was hoping to beat the rain and have some time to prep for the storm.

As I drove into their driveway I found my mother and my father attempting to secure their kayaks on a rack he had built outside their garage.  My dad was trying to climb a small stepladder and my mother was arguing with him to stay off the ladder.  Good timing I thought, reinforcing my decision to go out there.

 

I had been following the path of Tropical Storm What’s His Name all weekend.

What is his name?

Hurricane EE I EE I O…I think?

No that can’t be right.  There are a lot of “EE I’s” in there but don’t think there are any “O’s.”

Can I buy a consonant please, Pat?

 

Anyway, all the models had it moving directly over Dorchester County, Maryland, the area of the Eastern Shore of where my parents live.  It was still believed it would be upgraded to Hurricane before making landfall somewhere in the Carolinas.  The storm wasn’t expected to be over Dorchester County and Woolford until about 9 a.m. Tuesday so after securing the kayaks and a few other items in the yard it was time to relax, get some sleep, and wait until the morning.

 

The first tornado touched down near Vienna, Maryland at 6:01 a.m. way ahead of the 8 a.m. to 9 a.m. that we expected.  Vienna is further down Route 50 closer to Salisbury.  When I got up at 6:44 the new tornado warning included the towns of Secretary and Hurlock on the eastern side of Dorchester County.

Raining hard, the river was high but the wind not too bad.  We watched the local news station out of Salisbury to keep up with the storm’s progression and the tornado warnings as we waited it out.

We watched as the eyewall passed over our area, the wind briefly kicked up but soon according to the weather station we were watching, we would be out of trouble as Tropical Storm What’s His Name moved toward Philadelphia and New Jersey.

 

Friday, June 29, 2012, was a really hot day and part of a heatwave our Northern Virginia area was experiencing.  But by that evening we would experience a weather event most had never even heard of.  We learned a new word almost as difficult to pronounce as the name of this week’s Hurricane.

We experienced…a Derecho.

According to NOAA, Derechos are fast-moving bands of thunderstorms with destructive winds. The winds can be as strong as those found in hurricanes or even tornadoes! Unlike hurricanes and tornadoes, these winds follow straight lines.

 

On this particular day in June when the temperature hit 104 degrees, a small thunderstorm that began in Iowa would begin its journey east and as it crossed Indiana it would become a Derecho.  As it continued its route towards the east and encountered the Appalachian Mountains, instead of losing steam as often happens with storms reaching the mountains, the hot humid air mass that existed that day on the other side provided additional energy.  By the time it reached the Baltimore/Washington, DC corridor and its suburbs including mine in Northern Virginia, winds had reached as much as 60 to 80 miles an hour. Reston a town adjacent to mine logged a gust of 79 miles per hour.

When it was over it left destruction and over a million people in our area without power.  The restoration of power took an unusually long time as you might expect.  Ice was scarce, and without refrigeration and freezers, food was lost.  As the heatwave continued, without air conditioning life became really uncomfortable very quickly.  I remember Kim and I sitting in the blow-up pool we had for Cameron for hours.  After spending a sleepless Saturday night due to the heat, on Sunday I put the kids up in a nearby hotel that had backup power.  Cameron was only two years old at the time and there is nothing worse than being stuck in a hot house with hot, sweaty, cranky daughters.

No, as they say, I ain’t doing it,  I would rather sit in a blow-up pool in my back yard with temperatures over 100 degrees for a week than deal with all that.  It was well worth the investment.

I don’t remember exactly when our power finally did come back on but I think it was Tuesday which was relatively good as I remember.  It was a miserable experience and after that weekend we all knew what the word Derecho meant.

 

As Tropical Storm Whatchamacallit began its movement north the local weather people began to draw lines on their weather maps indicating the “all clear” area. If you were behind the line you were all good. So once we were safely behind that line we began to relax and listened as the weather stories focused on counties further north and in Delaware.

Then all of a sudden our winds shifted to the west.  That was an even better signal that we were now on the better side of the storm.

Though we received a lot of rain we dodged the tornadoes and the wind we had from the storm was minimal.

Or was it?

 

Gradually that wind from the west began to get stronger.

And then it got even stronger.

And the river awoke with huge white caps that crashed onto the docks and bulkheads creating spray normally only seen with an ocean wave.

And the rain came down even harder as trees bent and broke and were pulled up from their roots.

Now that we were safely behind the “all clear” line, we suddenly had a real storm to contend with.  And in a short period of time while our local weather folks in Salisbury talked about Dover and above, somehow our “Hurricane What’s His Name ” had returned.

As the waves smashed against the bulkheads and the docks up and down the river they began to break up.  The familiar duck blind in the cove up the river disappeared and ended up in a nearby yard.

My dad’s pier, like the other piers up and down the river, began to break up as well.

Trees fell up and down the street.

“Hey,” I said as I messaged the TV station via Facebook Messenger, “we have some serious weather here in Woolford!”  But still no mention.  Then I even sent a video. But no response.

What the heck was going on?

Three tractor-trailers on the Frederick C. Malkus Bridge had been blown over!

And we were “all clear.”

 

Finally, as our new storm began to calm down, we started to get a mention and an explanation of what was going on.

And on Tuesday, like that day in June of 2012 when we learned what a Derecho was, we learned what a Sting Jet was.

According to the internet and the local weather guy:

A sting jet is a relatively localized jet of rapidly descending cold air inside a deep extratropical cyclone. It affects a small region, compared to the size of the cyclone, and lasts only several hours. Destructive winds of over 150 km/h (93 miles an hour) have been attributed to sting jets.

So while Tropical Storm EE I EE I O was marching across the Delmarva and into Pennsylvania and New Jersey, in Dorchester County, Maryland we had a Sting Jet!

 

As the winds began to subside and the rain stopped, I cleared the pine tree that fallen in the front from the road.  Then I collected the boards from the neighbor’s dock that included parts of three nearby docks. I assessed the damage to my dad’s dock and would put the repairs off to another day.

I picked up the branches and the crab traps that had blown into the neighbor’s yard.

I spoke with some of the neighbors who shared stories of similar damage.

All in all though, no one was hurt and the damage could be repaired or removed.

 

And for the second time in my life, I experienced a new weather phenomenon. Well, new to me and the local weather guy on TV who admitted he had never seen this before.

 

Though I am having a little fun with the name of this storm that most of couldn’t pronounce, including a few weather persons I listened to, my prayers go out to those who suffered serious damage to house and home, physical injury, and especially the families of the at least nine people who lost their lives to the storm.

 

ISAIAS

ees-ah-EE-ahs

 

EE I…EE I… OOOOOOOOO…

The end.

 

The sun goes down ending a crazy day.

 

At least it didn’t wash away.
Moonlight Over San Diego

Moonlight Over San Diego

Sunday, August 2, 2020.

It’s 4:51 Pacific Time.

“On to the track for the 7th race.  Post time in nine minutes”

 

Del Mar thoroughbred racetrack is located in San Diego.  I have never been to Del Mar.

I have been to San Diego once.

My brother Gary lives in San Diego.

Often when talking about my brothers I would refer to one as my “California brother” and the other as my “Cancer brother.”

In fact, the only trip I made to San Diego was to visit my “California brother” and it was with my “Cancer brother” Carl.

It is a nice memory.

Though I didn’t know it at the time he wanted to make that trip because he thought his cancer that was in remission had returned.  Thankfully that turned out not to be the case.

After that, we would kid him a little that every time he traveled or showed up somewhere unexpectedly it meant it was time for us to go buy a suit.

Like the second trip he made to San Diego with his wife Teesha, and the Mother’s Day he showed up unannounced at my mother’s after learning he had mesothelioma.

It was never really funny, but in more hopeful times it got a little laugh.

I would probably visit San Diego more often.

But you know, you have to be invited.

Then, of course, there is the virus.

 

“The horses are now approaching the starting gate.”

 

The seventh race at Del Mar was scheduled for 5 o’clock Pacific Time which makes it 8 o’clock here on the east coast.

The seventh race at Del Mar is special to me today because one of my horses is entered. You may recall from my post “We’re Going to Make It…” that I made a very small investment in four two-year-old fillies.

 

“The horses have now reached the starting gate.  It’s Post Time!  They’re at the starting gate for the seventh race at Del Mar.”

 

Moonlight D’Oro is the two-year-old daughter of Medaglia d’Oro, the dad.  Medaglia d’Oro was a very successful grade one stakes winner who raced until age five.  Moonlight’s mom Venetian Sonata was also a grade one stakes runner who had marginal racing success.

The conditions of the race are the requirements a horse must meet to be entered into a race.  In this case, the conditions are that this is a Maiden race at five furlongs for two-year-old fillies only.  The maiden term means none of the horsed entered have ever won a race though they may have started other races but just not won.   The purse is $55,000.

In the case of Moonlight d’Oro,  she has never run a race.  She is a first-time starter. She had been working out very successfully and as a result her trainer Richard Mandella felt it was time.  Of the four horses I made my very small investment in, Moonlight d’Oro is the first to be entered into a race.  She will exit the gate as the number 4 horse and will be ridden by jockey Flavien Prat, a French jockey who has been riding in the States since 2015.  So far today Flavien has already won two races.

Moonlight d’Oro was the morning line favorite to win the race with early odds at 8 to 5.  Currently, as we get close to post time, she is 2 to 5, the heavy favorite.

 

“Roll Up Mo Money moving in with Moonlight d’Oro.”

“They’re off!”

 

Thoroughbred racehorses all turn a year older on January 1st.  Therefore, any horse foaled in 2018 as far as race conditions are concerned is considered to be two years old in 2020.  Moonlight d’Oro’s actual birthday was May 2, 2018, so she is twenty-seven months old today.  Though it is not unusual for a horse to begin racing as a two-year-old it is just as common for trainers to wait until they are three when they are a little more mature.

The more well-known races such as the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness, and the Belmont, otherwise known as the Triple Crown are limited to horses that are three years old.  Most of the time the entrants to these races are male horses though there have been some girls who have been successful running against the boys like Winning Colors in 1988 and Genuine Risk in 1980 and Regret in 1915.

 

“Moonlight d’Oro finds herself six lengths off the lead early on.”

 

One of the unusual aspects of this seventh race at Del Mar is that none of these horses have ever been entered in a race.  They are all very young and very inexperienced.  Their only practice has been working out in the mornings, running against a stablemate or two, and breaking from the practice gate.  Therefore anyone of these horses could step up today and win this race.  One of them will “break their maiden” today.

 

“Nothing yet from the favorite Moonlight d’Oro who’s at the back of the pack”

 

The workouts are timed by the “clockers.”  Therefore there is some data, though not always considered to be very reliable, on how a horse may be progressing in their training.  Moonlight d’Oro produced a “bullet workout,” in other words, one of the best of the day at Santa Anita back on June 13 and has worked well over the Del Mar surface at five furlongs in preparation for this race.

 

“And they’re into the stretch. And it’s Roll Up Mo Money who has taken the lead”

 

I should probably go visit my “California brother” more often.

I was just kidding about the invitation, he asks us to come out all the time.

I can’t visit with my “Cancer brother” anymore.

I should probably learn something from that.

But we don’t always learn.  I have written about that before.

Then of course there is the virus.

 

“Closing in between horses is Moonlight d’Oro who’s kicked it in too”

“But Roll Up Mo Money is going to do it”

 

I don’t know if investing in these horses will ever turn out to be good as an investment, but it has been certainly worth the well-needed distraction.

Moonlight d’Oro had a big kick at the end and finished second.

She ran a really nice race coming way off the pace and closing nicely.

She will be fine.

She made another nice memory.

 

Who Moved My Cheese…Again

Who Moved My Cheese…Again

It was September 11, 1970.

As Bruce Springsteen described in his autobiography Born to Run, the Steel Mill concert at the Clearwater Swim Club located in the Atlantic Highlands section of Middletown Township New Jersey was billed as a “Free Mad Dog” concert.  Vinnie “Mad Dog” Lopez was the band’s drummer who had been arrested in Richmond shortly before and they needed money to bail him out of jail.

I met up with some friends at the beach in North Long Branch and we hitchhiked our way up the coast to Atlantic Highlands.  Hitchhiking was a fairly common mode of transportation back then.

My brother had gotten a ride with one of his friends.  We were sitting near the right side of the pool.

I had a tendency back then to like to wander through the crowds socializing.

At some point, a plainclothes police officer who was also moving through the crowd attempted to arrest someone for something and got thrown in the pool.

As a result of that and the 10 p.m. noise curfew, the uniformed Middletown Police arrived with literally a busload of police officers intent on enforcing the noise curfew.

So around 10 p.m. they shut off the power and pandemonium ensued. There was a lot of scuffling around the stage, and amplifiers were coming down.

As the chaos broke out the crowd began to flee the venue and the police.

At some point in the confusion, an arm reached out and grabbed my shirt.

It was my brother.  “Stay right next to me,” he said as we worked our way out, holding on to my shirt the whole way out.  My memory is a little fuzzy on what happened after but no doubt we all ended up back in North Long Branch in Johnny’s Luncheonette parking lot trading stories about our crazy evening.

There would be others.

 

Though we were two years apart we had a lot of the same friends, we hung out in the same places, liked the same music, and as in the story above he took good care of me.  The downside of that being that when we were younger my mother would sometimes buy us the same clothing so there are school pictures where we were dressed alike. And since Carl was bigger than me, once he grew out of his, I had to wear it another year or two.

 

I remember one Christmas I had bought him four or five forty-five records as a present, wrapped them up and hid them under my bed.  But since I liked the forty-fives so much one day before Christmas when no one was around I unwrapped them, listened to them a couple of times, re-wrapped them, and put them back under the bed.

My mother bought us our first record albums at the Superama in Shrewsbury, or maybe it was at Two Guys From Harrison, no I think it was the Superama.  If you are from Jersey you may remember those stores.  Carl got The 4 Seasons Gold Vault of Hits and I got the Beach Boys’ Surfin’ U.S.A.

 

Carl growing up was “Chris” or “Chrissie”.  We didn’t start calling him Carl until we were adults so that was fairly recently, and still, then it was just every now and then.

 

He could torment the heck out of you with his teasing and pranks.

Once when we were younger he stood at the top of the steps of the split level house my dad had built where we grew up, in Oceanport, New Jersey, holding a deck of cards and asked me if I wanted to play Fifty Two Pick Up. Since I liked to play cards and liked playing with my brother I enthusiastically said yes.

Then he threw the deck of cards down the stairs and they landed scattered all over our hallway at the bottom of the steps and said:

“Okay, then pick them up.”

Then he laughed real hard.

I should have seen that one coming.

 

Gary who was seven years younger than Carl took the brunt of his pranks though.

We all three boys shared the same bedroom.  My dad had built this elaborate headboard system with bookshelves for each one of us in between the beds.  Gary had the bed closest to the door and Chrissie was in the middle.  One day Carl was kneeling in between his bed and Gary’s pretending to be taking big whiffs of something he was holding cupped in his hands.  Every time he took a big whiff he would comment on how great it smelled.  Gary was watching and so he asked Gary if he would like to smell it too and Gary said yes.  So he snapped the ammonia inhaler he had cupped in his hands just before Gary took a big snort.  Gary freaked and ran out of the room screaming and crying.  It was hysterical.

Another time we were camping and the campground was near a farm that had an electrical fence.  Patty was a baton twirler at the time.  Chrissie was holding Patty’s baton by the rubber end and touching the fence and saying how cool it was.  He asked Gary if he wanted to touch the fence with the baton too and of course Gary yes.  So he handed Gary the baton which Gary grabbed by the metal part.  Then Gary touched the fence.  That was pretty funny too.

 

Growing up he fought most of the battles with my parents first so when I wanted to do something like grow my hair long, wear hippie-like clothes, listen to loud rock music, and have the freedom to roam, my parents had already given up on the fight.

As soon as he could get his working papers at the age of thirteen he started working.  First at Frank Callahan’s market in old Oceanport.  Then he parlayed jobs and learned printing skills that eventually got him to Lucent Technologies and a very early retirement offer.

Somewhere along the way, he was exposed to asbestos.  He also always thought the chemicals in the print shop were the cause of his colon-rectal cancer since he knew other printers who had also developed the same cancer.

 

In those early years too he flipped cars like he flipped jobs, buying selling, even trading with his friends.   He always had cool cars.  In fact, I bought my first car from him, my first motorcycle, and my first pick-up truck.

 

One time I had a date with this new girl.  She was a big Billy Joel fan and I was taking her to the Billy Joel concert at the Monmouth College (it wasn’t a University then)  on his Piano Man tour.

Carl knew this was an important date for me so he asked if I wanted to borrow his car that night.  At the time he had a 1971 white Corvette.  She was very impressed.  I remember I tried to kiss her once though and she pulled back because she said that I would mess up her lipstick.

Needless to say, that one didn’t work out (thankfully).

Never the less I still made a big impression thanks to Billy Joel and my brother.

 

I recall one day, we were probably in our early twenties, and we were driving somewhere.  As he drove I sat in the passenger seat doing my best Richard Lewis shtick, complaining about whatever it was I was hating life about at the time.

He listened quietly as I ranted and finally he stopped me and said something like:

“Listen to yourself!”

“All you have been doing since we have been driving is complaining.”

“What the hell do you have to complain about?”

“Why don’t you quit bitching and complaining and just be happy?”

I shut up and sat quietly after that thinking about how I was acting and feeling a little silly.

He was right.

 

I think since he knew my propensity back then for being miserable and complaining, not too long after he had lost his job at Lucent, I left the company I had worked at for fifteen years and had trouble finding a new job.

He sent me a book called “Who Moved My Cheese” and he said it had helped him to view his situation more positively.  He thought it might do the same for me.

If you are not familiar, “Who Moved My Cheese” is the story of four mice named Sniff and Scurry and Hem and Haw The book is about the different ways we respond to change.  In the book, Cheese is the metaphor for what we want in life.  I think Carl knew he was more Sniff and Scurry and that I was more Hem and Haw.

The book explains that no source of cheese lasts forever.  Life changes whether we like it or not because change is inevitable and we need to learn to anticipate it, adapt to it, embrace and enjoy it.  Do this and you will enjoy more success and fulfillment in every part of your life and work.

It worked for him.

He went on to work for himself and build a great business as his family grew and made many very loyal friends.  He encountered many challenges along the way but always remained positive.

 

The morning of Tuesday, June 30,  I was the only one at my sister Patty’s house when my sister in law Teesha called my cell phone and told me Carl had just died.

I freaked.

I got angry at God and Carl that he couldn’t have waited another freaking hour so that I could talk to him, and with no one in the house I was expressing that disappointment quite vocally and loudly.

Afterward, I felt a little silly once again.

Because I know if he could have, he would have said “what the hell are you angry, and complaining about? I’m not angry and complaining and I’m the one who died!   Just quit complaining and be happy!”

And he would have been right again.

 

For my family, once again our cheese got moved and in an instant, our lives changed.

And though we anticipated it, I have to say it’s been really hard to embrace it.

But Carl did.

And now he is at peace, he is not in any more pain, and he doesn’t have to worry about overcoming any more challenges.

He can just be happy.

 

He found his cheese…again.

 

This was Christmas 1962
not sure, 1958 or 1959?
2015
North Long Branch in the 1970’s, that is Johnny’s on the left.  The ocean is a half a block to the left of Johnny’s.
Superama, the record section in fact.
Identical sweater photos
Some Fourth of July
Early 2000’s
Memorial Day Weekend 2020

(North Long Branch photo courtesy of MonmouthBeachLife.com, the Superama photo courtesy of TroyMartin.com)

My Ride’s Here

My Ride’s Here

I was staying at the Westin
I was playing to a draw
When in walked Charlton Heston
With the Tablets of the Law

He said, “It’s still the Greatest Story”
I said, “Man I’d like to stay
But I’m bound for glory
I’m on my way
My ride’s here…”

 (From “My Ride’s Here” as written by Paul Muldoon and Warren Zevon)

 

I got a nice email from Mike Vineyard back in early May.  Mike is the brother of Steve Vineyard, my pastor who passed away unexpectedly back in January of this year.

You might remember.

I won’t share it exactly but in his email he said he had read and enjoyed some my posts and had even subscribed to the website.

I don’t know Mike.

He didn’t remember meeting me and truthfully I don’t remember meeting him either.  Ever since having Donny’s funeral at the Sterling United Methodist Church, I don’t like to attend funerals there.    So I generally make myself as busy as I can be helping out in some way that keeps me distracted.

But I surely appreciated his comments and his desire to receive my future posts.

 

“My Ride’s Here” was the eleventh studio album released in May of 2002 by singer-songwriter Warren Zevon.  I read that he described the album as a meditation on death.

It was released several months before Zevon was diagnosed with a type of cancer called mesothelioma.

Warren Zevon passed away in September of 2003 at the young age of fifty-six.

 

According to the Mayo Clinic:

Malignant mesothelioma (me-zoe-thee-lee-O-muh) is a type of cancer that occurs in the thin layer of tissue that covers the majority of your internal organs (mesothelium).

Mesothelioma is an aggressive and deadly form of cancer. Mesothelioma treatments are available, but for many people with mesothelioma, a cure isn’t possible.

The primary risk factor for mesothelioma is exposure to asbestos.

 

My brother Carl had mesothelioma.

He died on Tuesday morning, about fourteen months after his diagnosis, at the young age of sixty-six.

 

According to my California brother Gary, who recently was able to spend a week with Carl, he told him that he really liked the song “My Ride’s Here” by Warren Zevon.

Zevon didn’t know he had mesothelioma at the time that he wrote that song.  Yet most interpretations believe “My Ride’s Here refers to the last ride, the one that takes us to the other side.”

Another wrote: “I hope when my time comes I can show half of the class that Warren had and that I can catch my last ride with the dignity he had. There’s no warning, no big production, just the fact that it happens to all of us.”

My brother was a class act.  A genuinely nice guy.

Back in April, I connected with a friend, Lee Scott, who was part of the group of friends we hung with back in Jersey in the early 70’s via Facebook.  I told Lee coincidentally my brother and I had been reminiscing  and talking about him a short time before that.  He asked about Carl and I explained what was going on.  In his response, he said he was sorry to hear and that Carl “was always the more sane of us.”

He was.

He was the pragmatic one.

 

We have all heard this said I’m sure “yeah I know that guy, he would give you the shirt off his back!”

In the literal sense, I don’t know if my brother Carl would have given you the shirt off his back.

He needed that shirt to hide the wounds, the scars, and the colostomy resulting from years of fighting rectal cancer, then lung cancer.

But he would have given you anything else you asked for and more often, even if you didn’t ask.

He just showed up.

Then he met a form of cancer he couldn’t beat, one where “a cure isn’t possible.”

And he faced it with dignity, continuing to give right up to end.

 

I still don’t know Mike Vineyard.

But I feel like I know him a little better today than I did last week.

I know what he felt like back in January and I expect I know what he feels like today.

 

Since Donny’s accident, I believe as the Bible says, God knows the day your ride is going to show up.  I know that it happens to all of us, and as much as we would like to think otherwise, we don’t have control.

And so Tuesday morning, without a lot of production, and to some degree for us, without warning, Carl decided, as the song said,

“Man I’d like to stay

But I’m bound for glory

I’m on my way

My ride’s here…”

 

 

Well, okay then.

 

I wish you would have waited another hour or two, but I understand.

 

You couldn’t miss your ride.

 

I love you.

 

I will see you when I see you.

 

 

 

 

The Rose Ceremony

The Rose Ceremony

I could be handy, mending a fuse
When your lights have gone
You can knit a sweater by the fireside
Sunday mornings go for a ride
Doing the garden, digging the weeds
Who could ask for more?
Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I’m sixty-four?

From When I’m Sixty Four by Lennon and McCartney

 

The song When I’m Sixty Four was released on the Beatles’ Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band album in May of 1967.  It is said that it is one of the first songs written by McCartney when he was just sixteen years old.  Quite an accomplishment at such a young age to try to project what it might be like growing old together in a relationship.

Sounded perfect.

Who could ask for more?

 

 

The Rose Ceremony.

A single rose always means “I love you.”

As the first gift of a husband and wife, they exchange the single rose each holds.

Remember, in every marriage, there are times when it is difficult to find the right words; difficult to say “I am sorry” or “I forgive you.”

If this should happen, the gift of the rose will say for you.

“I am sorry.”

“I still love you.”

And the other should accept the rose for the words which cannot be found.

 

I celebrated my 64th birthday this past weekend.

Kim celebrated her 59th birthday on Monday.

And twenty years ago today Kim and I said the words and exchanged the roses as part of our wedding vows.

It was a simple wedding.

With the exception of Kim’s sister Kathy and my brother Gary, the wedding party was made up of kids.  Some ours, some not ours.

Pastor Lee Crosby officiated on the first day of work with his first assignment right out of Divinity School at the Sterling United Methodist Church.

The reception was simple, catered by the local deli with a keg of beer and box wine and held at our townhouse.

The next day we bolted up to New Jersey for a second reception at Monmouth Park’s Clubhouse outdoor patio for the Jersey group.

We even had a race named in our honor, and a photo in the winner’s circle.

 

 

I think there was a time for both of us when we didn’t feel we would get this opportunity.

Answered prayers I always called it.

The past twenty years have gone by quickly.

We were talking the other evening while hunkered down in the compound which is our backyard where we find ourselves a lot lately, our marriage has never been stressed.

Not that we haven’t endured stress, in fact, we have had unbelievable stress.

But it’s never affected our relationship.

We had our four kids.  And they provided plenty of opportunities for us and our relationship to be challenged.

But that never happened, even in the worst of situations.

And we had some Holy Spirit heavy lifters.

 

Now I find myself sixty-four and like in the song, growing old together, and realizing the growing old part may present the biggest challenge in life that I, or we, will face.

My lyrics, however, might sound more like:

I could be handy, clean the garage

When your patience is gone

You can sit and relax by the fire pit

In the morning go for bike ride

I’ll do the garden, dig all the weeds

Clean the bathrooms too!

Will you still need me, I will still feed you

When I’m sixty four!

 

And true to our Rose Ceremony, there were more than a few times when I had to cough up a rose to bail myself out.

Wait, now that I think about it, I may have been the only one coughing up roses the last twenty years, I might need to go back and read that Rose Ceremony fine print again…

Seems I may have been the only one ending up in those situations for which words cannot be found.

 

Truth is…

I couldn’t ask for more.

Happy Anniversary Baby